Mungkin tidak ada camar lain yang menyadari bahwa terbang rendah memberi banyak keuntungan. Kebanyakan mereka berkata, “Terbang rendah itu milik burung Pelikan!”
Padahal, andai saja mereka mengerti bahwa dengan terbang rendah, jangkauan pandangan mata akan semakin dalam. Terbang rendah membuat aku bisa menentukan kualitas makanan yang akan aku dapatkan. Ikan yang lebih kecil? Atau yang besar.
Tapi jujur, terbang rendah tidak mudah. Menghentikan sayap pada satu kepakan lalu merentangnya lebar-lebar, bukanlah eksistensi seekor camar yang sesungguhnya. Melawan kodrat camar? Sebetulnya tidak juga!
Persoalannya tidak banyak camar yang mau melawan sedikit kebiasaannya. Kebanyakan larut lalu ikut saja tanpa mau sedikit bereksperimen. Padahal kalau mau dicoba, wuih! Luar Biasa!!
Entahlah, di satu sisi aku ingin katakan kepada kawanan lain bahwa belajar terbang –yang salah satunya tentang terbang rendah– adalah soal yang utama dalam hidup ini. Di sisi lain, aku pun sebetulnya belum sepenuhnya berhasil.
Setidaknya, di dalam hatiku ada kerinduan itu.
Mengepakkan sayap,
sebuah ujaran hati yang tertahan
tersekat pada sebuah keterbatasan
Mengepakkan sayap,
sebuah realitas hati
titik yang terdalam
yang kerap berkata
“TIDAK!” pada kehendak diri sendiri.
6 Maret 2003, 7312
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